Things I Did and Saw Today...

1. Asked by the AP to run up two flights of stairs, on command, in order to corner students suspected of smoking.
   
2. Threatened to cut off the hands of one of my students who was digging through my desk without permission. Again.
3. Informed the class of the death of Coretta Scott King right before I started a mini-lesson on Martin Luther and the Protestant Reformation. This caused profound confusion. "Yo! Reverend King lived in the 1500's?"
4. Watched a seventh grade girl take a serious slap in the face after she called another girl a "whore." The whack was so loud and hard I yelped, "Daaaammmmmn!"
   
5. Pretended that I didn't care in the least when informed that I would be getting a new, highly volatile, and physically violent student in my class next week.
   
6. Informed all of my students that I was failing them for the 3rd quarter unless they get their hygiene under control.